American women have become trailblazers in the expansion of life's options, experiencing lives of multiplicity, not
simplicity. The expansion of women's lives necessitates, now more than ever, the increased utilization of power. Yet the
concept of power still carries negative connotations for women who need to utilize power with increased comfort. Thus, a
woman's quest for power is complicated by past stereotypical images of powerful people.
The physiological underpinning of gender differences, which ensured survival of the species for millennia, do not
necessarily support or match life choices in the 1990's.
Specifically, women have a biological map to provide adequate care for offspring, producing and "other-directed" inner
program. Focusing on needs of others complicates a woman's ability to use power, for she tends to worry about people around
her. Women appear to recoil from the word power, reacting as though they are being
asked to give up their sense of self. Somehow, in the female vocabulary, power has taken a problematic negative connotation. Transforming the negative label into
a positive power mindset is a major ingredient in a woman's quest for power.
Often, women as they consider power behaviors, find it difficult to overcome past stereotypical images. Thinking is a
complex process with which we make sense of information that surrounds us, by imposing some mental order on it. Breaking
stereotypes means reconsidering the mental order you've assigned. The cognitive framework or scheme that one places around a
concept is essential, and for a stereotype to be modified, new ideas have to be learned for the power concept.
Problematically, highly valued feminine traits are warmth, expressiveness, peace-making, giving, nurturing, thoughtful,
accommodating, emotional, and gentle. Although women possess these traits, it does not preclude them from using these traits
with power. Power no longer can be only in the framework of male behavior. Power, as a cognitive framework, needs to be
also incorporated into the female mindset.
Power, unfortunately, has taken on connotations, far afield from its real meaning.
A powerful person is seen as someone who dominates or controls others with inappropriate use of force. A powerful
person has been viewed as on who may be controlling or manipulative, enslaves others, or is a user of people for selfish
means. Too often, power has been viewed in a hierarchical way of power-over others, rather than a power-with others. The
dominant controlling version of power is power-over. This is the negative end of the continuum. The positive end of the
continuum is power-with.
Power-with promotes the well-being of self and others, and is inspirational and considerate of others.
It must be recognized that control is a separate word and concept. Unlinking the concept of control from the concept of
power is essential for women. Power and control are separate worlds, separate concepts, and separate constellations of
human behavior.
Women’s ability to incorporate power behaviors will be fast forwarded when they remove the concept of control from the
concept of power. Women need to engage in “out-of-the-box” thinking and reframe power as effectiveness.
Comfort with power begins with understanding the power you use daily. When you establish goals for your family, for
yourself, or for your business, you are exercising power. Managing daily activities, activating decision-making, developing
plans-all are exercises of power. When you conduct discussions with and employee or a colleague and brainstorm more effective
ways of approaching a problem, you are being powerful. When men and women are in loving are in loving relationships with
mutual reciprocity, they are expressing their personal power to each other. Power is integral to every moment of every day,
and is to be treasured, not avoided. Power enhances femininity as a nurturing force creating internal strength and calm, and
propels you toward effective living.
Positive power is the ability to implement adequate life strategies. Positive power is power-with. Positive power allows
an individual to be effective, to manage fears, to activate
their energies, and to act with confidence. In order to facilitate
a new non-aversive cognitive attitude, power independent of control will be termed
positive power. Positive power includes powerful initiatives coupled with compassion. Thus, a woman's quest for power necessitates a power-with
strategy.
Power is a skill, like any other, for achieving goals. To be effective, women have to use power to put their beliefs and
their needs into workable operation. Women clearly need the power to advance their own development, but they do not desire
to use their power to limit the development of others. Women are challenged, as they enter the new
millennium, to shed their lifelong conditioning that power is to be avoided. You need to jettison this belief, and move to an understanding of power
as essential to effective living.
In the United States, women are fifty-one percent (51%) of the population and fifty-four percent (54%) of the
electorate. Moreover, women are forty-six percent (46%) of the workforce, own thirty-eight percent (38%) of small businesses, and employ
one out of give workers. Women are opening businesses at twice the rate of men. Clearly,
opportunities for women are viewed as greater now than they have ever been. As the majority, women have tremendous potential for changing social policy,
economic trends, and the quality of life of society. The synergy of women growing, stretching and activating their power is
exciting. Women's quest for power will reshape society.
Dr. Marotta is in private practice at the center of Psychological Effectiveness,
Inc., in Plantation, Florida. She is the author of Power and Wisdom: The New Path For Women. (1-877-WISDOM-7 or 1-888-888-0102)
www.womenofwisdom.com. |
